It’s too hot: Let’s invade New Zealand.

It is unbearably hot here in south east Australia.

Last week, it was 29° at 7.30am on my way to work.

38° at 4pm.

Today was so hot it singed my body hair.

January and February are unliveable in Sydney. It is not just me. I admit, I’m a delicate petal, but others, like The Occasional Nomad agrees.

And the heat is increasing.

Yes, climate change deniers, it was so hot in Sydney 40 years ago, in my youth, that the asphalt on the street bubbled up, but you can deny away – it is definitely hotter for longer and with an increasing number of increasing hot days, with an increasing higher average now.

While we were sweltering in the high thirties for days, nay weeks, on end, Auckland had one day with a maximum of 32°, followed by days with a maximum of between 23° and 25°. This sounds perfect.

And they don’t have snakes or bugs or spiders or as many mozzies. The mozzies they have, are so limp you can swat them in the air by giving them a slap.

Whilst most of New Zealand goes to their family bach, maybe we could turn their homes into our baches?

Failing that, we could just invade and take over the country.

They don’t have an airforce or navy, so it should be easy. OK, not so easy. They’re known as fearsome soldiers.

Or maybe, as they are kinder than Australians [see, for example, how they would welcome the refugees locked on Manus Island] they might take pity on us in this heat, and let us summer on the North Island? They could put us up in a spare room for a couple of months. Please?

17 thoughts on “It’s too hot: Let’s invade New Zealand.

  1. And let us not forget the awesome Haka. For that alone, I would help you invade NZ.
    Hate Sydney weather!! And you know my feelings about weather apps that get it wrong. My car told me it was 41 degrees at 4pm. How so, when the predicted temp was 38? Not happy.

  2. New Zealand weather has been delightful, perfect really. A few people have complained about the “heat” and I’ve told them they have no idea what they’re talking about, that their weather is downright wonderful compared to what we experienced in Sydney (which I still loved in spite of the heat and humidity).

  3. We had a miserable summer last year (eastern US), too. Not that it is much consolation to you. But worse than the heat was the amount of rain we got last year – 178cm. And the wet trend seems to be continuing apace in 2019–as we have another day of nonstop rain today. Then there is a California ski resort that recently received almost 2 meters of snow–in one day. Climate deniers have their heads in the sand (or snow).

    • Wow! Two metres of snow! I can’t imagine that. I just looked up Sydney’s average annual rainfall, because I couldn’t tell if 178cm was a lot. (Thanks for commenting in metric, by the way.) Sydney’s average rainfall is 120cm. Was the rain in big storms or lots of wet days?

  4. Or you could move to Tas. We just had a dump of snow which put out the bushfires (thankfully). 19C here yesterday, which was a bit chilly really, for summer, but warming up today. We did have one day of 32C where we all thought we were going to expire..

  5. I’ve seriously weighed up both Tassie and New Zealand. The weather for the past 2 months has been monstrous! And all the shall not be mentioned elements (chafing, smelly feet, visible sweat lines, fatigue from no sleep…ah, joy!) I love summer though when you don’t have to fight it on the frontline at WORK – Aussies need siestas built in!

      • When I was in Tassie in December (twice) I heard the phrase “climate refugees” so many times. Tassie is actually facing weird climate issues of its own though. Antarctica??? On a cruise??? Now that…I will if you will!

  6. The temperatures you’ve been getting make me think of Dubai and UAE. Which to me are the centre of the world’s inferno temperatures. I laughed when PK, my friend from Rwanda, told me the usual temperature there was only 25C!!

    • Mmm. 25°. Very mild. Probably too cool for me to go for a swim. Unless the water temp is high. But great for going for a walk.

      30° is perfect for me. As long as I’m not in the sun for any length of time. 32° good. 35° yuck if it is humid. If it’s dry, OK. 38°, I’m melting. 40°, I’m cooking. When’s the change coming through?

      Funny how it is all relative to what you’re used to.

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